


bright

by belovedlyz



Series: nuanced petrichor [1]
Category: Lovelyz
Genre: Contemplated suicide, My First Work, and its not even readable, idk how to tag stuff, literal word vomit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-01
Updated: 2016-08-01
Packaged: 2018-07-28 14:18:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7644277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/belovedlyz/pseuds/belovedlyz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>seo jisoo, self-diagnosed damsel in distress, needs a light in the dark</p>
            </blockquote>





	bright

**Author's Note:**

> there are mentions of contemplated suicide so please be wary, don't worry too much though because its very light(?) I don't know how else to describe it but its not explicit and only mentioned briefly in the beginning. enjoy!

 

> _12 am._

seo jisoo reaches a new low tonight. barely able to contain her sadness, she's desperate to keep her mind from being engulfed by the darkness. her room is a disarray of shadows. the only light creeping in from between the curtains. sprawled in the center of the room, she contemplates the price of peace. each tick of the clock ricocheting in her head. its all _so loud._ pill bottles that should've been lined up in her medicine cabinet are scattered around her. _taunting_. _tempting_ her to dull the pain. save herself in one small swallow. except she knows it won't be small. (both figuratively _and_ literally) that _small_  action will cost her life. the complete opposite of what she wishes it would do. but maybe thats the point. maybe thats why all stories end after the rescue. so she wishes life were simple. like those fairytale books shoved in the back of her bookshelf. hiding behind the large daunting textbooks of reality. they haven't been opened in months.

in a moment of instinct, she's across the room with a book in hand before she can think. its her favorite; _sleeping beauty._ she had been captivated by the storyline for as long as she could remember. aurora the beautiful princess, a _damsel in distress_ , and prince phillip, her _knight in shining armor._ she flips through the pages again, simultaneously moving to sit down at her desk. she can remember sitting exactly like this everytime life came by to swallow her in a tsunami of suffering only to spit her right back into reality again. how she had wished for someone to rescue her. how she had wished for her knight in shining armor. and she remembers _him_ , the boy jisoo secretly glanced at during classes. the boy with two names. (one _the same as hers)_ she remembers hoping he would recognize her distress and sweep her off her feet to some alternative universe where pandora's box was still locked. and she cries, because the memories bring _so much pain_. but its not the memories that are painful, its the _feeling_ the memories bring. and she thinks, _if only someone could save her._ so she sits there, _waiting_ , book in hand, engulfed in the darkness. her tears stain the carpet below. but hours pass and no one comes. _no one_ ever _comes._  

but then something flickers in the corner of her eye. its a flame. a candle she had lit prior to reading the book. and she wonders when that had happened, when she had decided to light a candle instead of just flipping the switch of her desk lamp. its her favorite candle too, she realizes. the one that smells like the salty sea air and roses and _home_. and its _so bright_. but she stares straight into it, until she can feel her eyes burn and tear up again. and when she looks away, the shape of the flame is still etched into her vision. but this time she looks back to the book in her hand. its the page where prince phillip finally saves aurora. and it looks as if the page is being lit on fire.

slowly, as if hypnotized, her hand reaches the top of the page. and with a quick jerk of her elbow the page is torn. a gasp escapes from under her breath as she realizes what she has done. but once again, she's mesmerized by the candle in front of her, so she brings the corner of the page to the flame and watches as the the bright angry flame envelops the paper. watches as phillip slowly becomes mere ashes, but _aurora is still in her hand_ , still seemingly perfect and whole. almost as if nothing disturbed her peaceful slumber. she looks back to the book, and its almost as if she's hallucinating because its aurora, and she's awake and she's managed it without phillip. she's awake and _the world is at peace_. (somehow,  _jisoo feels proud)_

at that moment a light flickers on in her head. and candle in hand, she heads back to the center of the room, back to where she had previously faced that moment of complete utter darkness. she feels stuffy. so she places the candle down. and as the light dances across the carpet, illuminating the space enough for her to see, she notices the pill bottles again. with one sweep of her arms they are in front of her, where her eyes scan across the labels. she thinks, _never again_. tears well up in her eyes once more at the thought of her momentary weakness. her moment of _anguish_. she makes a mental note to visit her parents first thing tomorrow and gets up to put away the _(thankfully)_ untouched pill bottles back where they belong. on her way back into her room she sees the bright light creeping in through the window. and when she rushes over to push back the curtains, the sun is already staring back at her. its morning already. and its _so very bright_. her room lights up. with a turn of her head, she reads the clock.

> _6 am._
> 
> she _survived_.
> 
> and she'll manage it again. (but maybe with the lights on next time)

**Author's Note:**

> hi! so this was my first work, I hope you liked it! I honestly dont know why it turned out like this, it was originally going to be very lighthearted but whatever I guess. if you see any mistakes please feel free to comment below lol this is not edited. thanks for reading!


End file.
